Miracle on 15 Tebow Street, or How a Bargain Basement NFL Team Wins
DATELINE: HUMOR!
At this time of year many folks love to watch and re-watch the classic movie about a mysterious man who becomes the Santa Claus at Macy’s Department Store.
Some people begin to think he really is Santa Claus, and others begin to think he is a nutcase.
Well, in Denver right now, the scenario is playing out on the bluegrass field at Bronco Stadium. Tim Tebow has stepped in when the other QBs on the Bronco team looked like weak imitations of the Man in the Bronco suit.
Children are bowled over by Tebow, the new quarterback, and are the first true believers. Yet, the men in the upstairs suite have their doubts, despite the glowing and happy smiles of children all around them.
A man who once was considered the Denver Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy combined is now running the team, and he has a few trepidations about the new young QB named Tebow.
Tebow starts winning games and sending favored opposing teams to Gimbel’s bargain basement, which causes consternation among the dark-hearted, profit-driven cable TV media moguls.
Media types begin a campaign to unseat the young QB who brought Christmas spirit to the fans of Denver. They begin to question the sanity of Tebow who thinks he is a winner on a Crusade for God.
If the story plays out like the movie, we can expect a sanity hearing on the Eve of the Super Bowl with people testifying pro and con that Tim Tebow is not an NFL QB, but is merely a certifiable religious fanatic who scrambles too often.
Commissioner Roger Goodell will preside at the sanity hearing, feeling the heat of public opinion. In the end, Tebow’s defense crumbles until ESPN delivers cartloads of emails to the trial, all addressed to the “Greatest QB in the NFL Today.”
After reading the email, Commissioner Goodell announces, “If the sports media, exemplified by illustrious ESPN and its affiliates duly recognizes Tim Tebow as a the Greatest QB in the NFL Today, we defer to their measured judgment.”
It’s a happy ending with Tebow walking out into the twilight, ready for the Super Bowl. He is not playing, but will offer commentary for ESPN.
We’re a sucker for a holiday tear-jerker.
William Russo's newest book is now out, ready for your tablet, your smartphone, your Kindle or Nook. Read RED SOX 2011: A WHIMSICAL AUTOPSY to find a month-by-month examination of the team, showing all the signs of trouble that most sports media missed. His other sports books are SEX, DRUGS, SPORTS & WHIMSY and RAJON RONDO: SUPERSTAR!
