Bill Belichick’s Recipe For Scrambled Eggs Breaks a Few Bad Eggs
DATELINE: HUMOR!
Like the six wives of Henry VIII, the six cornerbacks of Bill Belichick III (number of his Super Bowl rings) have led brief lives.
If they do not please the kingpin, they are not beheaded. No, nothing quite so drastic as that is the New England Patriot way.
New England combines lynchpin with safety pin, but the safety has become undone most of the time.
Bill Belichick does not send them to the gulag in Siberia if they fail to present him with a Super Bowl baby.
The defensive linemen of New England are not treated quite as badly as the witches of Salem. Boston media has not burned them at the stake out.
This week languishing Patriot Leigh Bodden joins that elite group of castoffs and castaways.
Brandon Meriwether, James Saunders, Darius Butler, Daryl Dawkins, Assante Samuel, and the first of the assassinated cornerbacks, Ty Law, all had some flaw in character, some missing component that led the mercurial coach to lose faith in them, eventually succumbing to the whim of banishment.
We fear that the casualty rate for dethroned cornerbacks may swell the ranks of the dearly departed from New England. Once you’re dead in Belichick’s scheme, you don’t return.
No one pinches the chocolate candies in the gift box more than Belichick. Fans have to check to see if each one has been nibbled upon before being reinserted into life’s candy store.
Perhaps there is no auspicious time to rid your coaching-ship of an unfaithful queen, as Henry VIII discovered.
Belichick’s recipe for an omelet always breaks a couple of good eggs during the process.
You cannot wait until the first snowfall to send some of these greedy little cornerbacks off to Siberia. You cannot wait until the spell of the witch has taken hold of the team.
Bill Belichick chops off the offending digit like a nervous accountant before the Internal and infernal revenue agent comes calling.
If fans watch defensivebacks closely the rest of this season, they may see whether Devin McCourty is of the royal line or is merely another royal pain to his majesty Belichick.
Though the McCourty jester has shown up at the king’s royal game during several weeks this season, the merry old soul of Coach Belichick has given a bye week to the young cornerback.
Playing the royal defensive favorite is not without its risks.
Yet, this week McCourty must feel the cold breeze of the Siberian Express, or was that the whiplash of the latest blade coming down on Leigh Bodden’s delicate neck?
Bill Belichick has a Salem witch’s broom to sweep out the locker room of broken eggshells.
William Russo's newest book is now out, ready for your tablet, your smartphone, your Kindle or Nook. Read RED SOX 2011: A WHIMSICAL AUTOPSY to find a month-by-month examination of the team, showing all the signs of trouble that most sports media missed. His other sports books are SEX, DRUGS, SPORTS & WHIMSY and RAJON RONDO: SUPERSTAR!
