LeBron: You Can’t Go Home Again, as Ohio Turns the Screw
DATELINE: REVENGE!
The great sovereign state of Ohio may be round at the edges, but it’s fairly sharp too!
The governor, one John Kasich, guaranteed his re-election yesterday by issuing one of those public relations resolutions the Chamber of Commerce likes so much.
This resolution had a slight edge: Ohio commended the Mavericks on their NBA Championship, trouncing the team joined by one of the state’s formerly most famous citizens.
Though Texas and Ohio have seldom been on the same side of sports wars, this time Dallas fans have found friends in Cleveland.
Without mentioning a certain home state resident who moved his talents to another place, the Ohio resolution commended values it treasured in its citizens: “loyalty, integrity and teamwork.”
The resolution noted that Dirk Nowitzki stayed with the Dallas team and refused free agency. It’s enough to make Nowitzki and all the Mavericks honorary Ohioans.
Can a state strip a citizen of his citizenship? Though Constitutional scholars may debate the idea, if it were put on the ballot as a referendum, LeBron James would be sent packing to a state where tax shelters and charitable work don’t cut the state revenues.
No, the resolution does not make LeBron James the man without a country, or even a state. But, one would think that going home again to Ohio should be done in the darkest of nights, in the height of a storm, when people are not on the roads to see.
The lesson here is how heart warming it can be to find that Americans can put aside the Civil War and agree that we adhere to higher values than personal gain.
William Russo writes humor about sports, which is not always appreciated by sober-minded sports puritans. If you like his work, you should check out RAJON RONDO: SUPERSTAR! and SEX, DRUGS, SPORTS & WHIMSY, especially volume 2, for rakish fun.
